I’ve already described how it felt when Lilly broke down and cried in front of me as I removed her blindfold at the end of an intense kidnap scene. I was both concerned that I had pushed her too far and touched that she felt secure enough to show me the emotional vulnerability of that moment.
Imagine my delight when she sent me her own account! Tears in a BDSM session can be a very special thing. As Lilly says, such tears are not tears of sadness, pain or fear, but of cleansing and release. I find her description quite beautiful.
Top 10 Most Embarrassing Moments- one of them must surely be unexpectedly bursting into tears in front of a lover during a red-hot private date in a dungeon. God. I wasn’t expecting it and I can only assume you weren’t either. Sorry about that.
I felt something trying to emerge when the heavy, painful nipple clamps were removed, and I awkwardly pushed it back down, fixing my blind gaze on an imaginary horizon and breathing slowly and deeply.
This is not the time or place. But my sense of time and place is so hampered by my blindfold. All I can see is the deepest blackness. I could be anywhere; I could be falling down a rabbit hole. I don’t know if we’ve been playing this game for ten minutes or an hour. Where are you? Where am I? If I reach out my hands, will I touch anything, or just feel empty space? If I take a step forward, will I fall?
The tension was running so high that seeing your kind, smiling face when you removed my blindfold made something snap and I just hugged you and cried into your shoulder. As I said at the time, I don’t really know why- I wasn’t sad or frightened or in pain. It felt like therapeutic sobbing, like shaking out a collection of background tensions and small stresses all at the same time. I still don’t fully understand what happened.
Socially, it was mortifying, but physically? I felt cleansed and energised. We started laughing and kissing. Thank you so much for understanding me. I came back to reality enough to want to wipe off my smeared eye liner and comb my hair. What now?
You gave me three options: more cuddles and aftercare on the bed, the chance to get my own back and dom you, or more submission “with lots of orgasms.” Well, of course, you had me at orgasms.
I love this for it’s openness, and for Lilly’s desire to drill down into her own feelings and responses after an intense BDSM session. I can totally relate to that.
Of the three options I gave her for the rest of the session, she chose: “More submission but with lots of orgasms.” This gave me confidence that she really had been comfortable with the intensity of our earlier games. I didn’t really want to hurt her any more so we played with a Doxy plugin vibrator/massager. I once read a review of one of these. The reviewer described the sensation of having an orgasm “ripped out of them”, an expression I didn’t fully understand till I witnessed Lilly’s responses to what I was doing. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone more completely lost in sensation.
God, it was hot!
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