SELF MEDICATION – needing it (sinful sunday)

Something had to happen. Having written about how my masochism had become a “black obsession stalking the soul” I needed to feed it; perhaps not the full meal of a long Domme/Sub session, but I had to give it a snack certainly. For many, many years the only way my kinks could be expressed was through self-inflicted pain. However, I have largely stayed away from this since regularly seeing mistresses, finding the blurring of the boundary between “kink” and “self-abuse” implied by such acts uncomfortable.

I allow myself (because it just feels SO good) to make an exception for nipple play. And so I found myself in the bathroom, a pink plastic peg attached to each nipple, enjoying the sharp sensation they caused.

It was just what I needed. However, perhaps through my nipples being de-sensitized by constant abuse, the sensation rapidly started to fade. So I added another clip.

This caused my to breathe a little more heavily. The beautiful sense of focus that comes from dealing with pain started to kick in. My cock grew harder in reaction to it. But I still had more pegs. So a third went on.

Breathing fast now, the sharp knife of pain twisting as I deliberately moved the pegs. An orgasm building and then engulfing me; not the long, rolling end-of-session orgasm I sometimes have with Elita but fast, angry, needed release.

I washed my “black obsession” down the plughole of the bathroom sink.

My name is BibulousOne and I’m a masochist.

My last pain was 4 hours ago.

You can read my thoughts on the obsessive side of my sadomasochism here.

More, though hopefully less obsessed, sin here: