A BIRTHDAY WHIPPING

I hadn’t wanted it the night before, tired and full of birthday food and good wine as I was. My mood had been more dominant than submissive too. But now, with London’s bright, morning light seeping round the edges of the still-drawn curtains, I asked her to use the two tailed whip. I was very explicit about how it was to be used: the number of strokes; how they were to land; the timing . “Not a proper submissive!” the kinky police might say; “Topping from the bottom!” and so I was, but she’s inexperienced and the whip is a nasty, bitey thing that needs to be used with care.

And anyway, it was my birthday!

To be whipped by a skilled Dominatrix is always an experience. I’ve tried to analyse why it’s so different from being caned; why my emotional response to it is always deeper. I’ve never got very far.

But to be whipped by my girlfriend, not as a service paid for and delivered, not even as an act of dominance and submission; to be whipped as an act of love-making between us, that turned out to be a very special thing. We explored the experience together, with me in the lead. I might not have seemed to be in the lead, were you watching, but my reactions to each stroke informed the next: a steady breath inviting a harder stroke, an anguished grunt suggesting she was near my limit. At the start I was very conscious that she needed that guidance.

Half way though I felt myself start to relax, sink a little deeper into the bed, and allow myself fully to enjoy the experience. She had the measure of the whip, landing it accurately at the top of my back or across my buttocks. The challenge was there, especially as it bit into my shoulder blades, but I trusted her now. She paused often, touching, soothing, connecting with me. It was beautiful when she did that.

By the end, she was putting some force into the whip, wrapping it round my arse exactly as I wanted her to. It was simultaneously perfectly painful, a challenging bite each time it landed, and yet perfectly sensual, to the extent that I asked for another dozen blows the same way.  If you know my age, you’ll know exactly how many I had already received! One more than it would have been last year, for sure.

She’s not really a dominant, any more than I’m really a submissive, but these labels don’t help much with people of such diverse tastes as ours. She enjoys playing the top role and has learnt confidence from our two sessions with Mistress Elita. She definitely has it in her: a streak of sadism, an enjoyment of the control. She likes the way she can turn a session round, just as she had earlier in the day,  pushing me up against a wall and hurting me. I put my hands behind my back so she could see that she had control and didn’t have to worry about a counter attack. It was very hot, very hot, I think, for both of us.

I think she worries that I was disappointed in the play with the whip: that she couldn’t take it far enough; didn’t yet have the confidence or skill to hurt me like Elita does. She needn’t think that. This was challenging, intimate, sensual; a beautiful piece of kinky intercourse.

I adored her even more at the end of it than I had before it started: adored her for her attentiveness and focus, for her desire to create an experience for me; adored her for the perfect balance of cruelty and care that she had showed me.

How wonderful to be able so accurately to press each other’s buttons in this way.

It seems I’m still a very lucky bastard.

This is published with the kind permission of my lovely, and very adventurous, friend.

This whip came from the excellent Joanna Lark. Everything I have bought from this website has been of superb quality. You can find the two-tailed “Latigo” whip here. It’s an interesting implement, with its stingy, bitey tails. It feels good in the hand and can deliver a wide range of sensations. It leaves pretty marks!

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