Yup. At the age of not-quite-sixty I’ve decided that sex is ace. Its not exactly the most startling revelation but its how I feel. I have no idea if I’m really any good at it (I mean look at my age, for goodness sake) but I don’t care because SEX IS ACE. It’s joyous, and life affirming and cathartic and renewing and intimate and hot and, just basically, REALLY FUCKING ACE!
I’m tempted to end this post there, because it already perfectly communicates the uncomplicated thought that has been in my head since I spent Saturday night in the dreamy company of Miss Lilly Watson. This is my blog and If I say a post only needs 50 words, that’s all it’s going to get!
I’m sat up against the headboard, a pillow behind my shoulders. Lilly sits on my lap. I’m inside her and we’re moving rhythmically against each other. She squeezes my nipples between her fingernails and pulls them, the sudden pain making me harder inside her. I lean forward and bite one of her nipples and squeeze the other until she closes her eyes and breathes it in deep. We alternate these actions, giving and receiving, exchanging pain and pleasure, all the time my cock moving inside her beautiful warmth
I’ve had great sex before but not for many, many years and those memories are too old to accurately compare this against. But I don’t need a comparison; I’m happy to take this for what it is, a glorious resurgence of feeling and vigour after a long time of abstinence and low energy.
She kneels in front of me on all fours. She’s expecting my cock but what she get’s instead is my finger in her arse, fucking her with it, fucking her hard until she’s moaning and crying out from the unaccustomed sensations. I want her to experience this not as kinky icing on a vanilla cake but as an experience in its own right, rich in the unfamiliar and the taboo. Conventional sex follows, pushing her down, deep into the duvet, claiming her as my own until she orgasms hard into the sheets.
There is no artifice in Lilly, no sense of a professional going about her business. For our time together, she is all mine: intimate, affectionate, connected; in a relationship with me that feels as intense as it is necessarily short lived.
I’ve bought her a Doxy vibrator for her birthday and she’s keen to try it. Really my job is just to hold it in position and it is possible to become disconnected in this, but I position myself over her, looking deep into her eyes, dominating her, making clear that the waves of intense pleasure she’s experiencing are mine to give and mine to take away. In this way it becomes both a power exchange and an intimate sex act, and I experience the intensity of her orgasms as if they were mine.
I don’t mind that I’m paying Lilly to have sex with me. That ‘not minding’ leaves me free to enjoy her company, enjoy her for the sparky, intelligent, empathetic human being she is and, of course, to enjoy her body for its beautiful curves, its smooth skin and its wonderful orgasms; I enjoy these things untroubled by the intermittent and transactional nature of our relationship.
I’ve bought her a ‘little extra’ present, a Rabbit tail butt plug. She’s almost shy as it goes in, still unfamiliar with anal toys, but she becomes sweet and playful once it’s in position, twisting round to admire the newness of her fluffy tail in the mirror. It’s fetching to see her like this, so full of carefree delight. I make love to her while she’s wearing it, holding the furry end and moving it around until I can feel the hard steel against my cock through the thin veil of her vagina wall.
And when, after we’ve finished and she’s curled into me, all soft touches and conspiratorial smiles, and she whispers that it was amazing for her too. I’m happy to believe her. I hope it’s true; I very much want it to be true. But, because she’s a sex worker and I’m her client, I don’t need it to be true. I’m just happy to have her fall asleep in my arms and to enjoy the quiet rhythms of her dreams.
Part 2 of this post is here
The image is used with permission of Miss Lilly Watson