I’ve been greedy – or perhaps needy is a better word. I have had two sessions in ten days. One a month is more normal. The first was wonderful but left me needing the second. That was wonderful too but my reactions to the two sessions could not have been more different.
Sometimes a session will follow a set plan, carefully thought out beforehand, perhaps even written down. Sometimes a session will just evolve, the Mistress letting it develop its own rhythm in response to how she feels and to the reactions of her submissive. My last session with Mistress Elita was most definitely the latter type. I arrived… Read More »
Something that greatly affects the outcome of a session with a Mistress is my mental state going in. Am I up or am I down? Do I arrive feeling positive, confident and motivated or do I arrive feeling bad about myself, negative and depressed?
I’m lying on the bed, tied, immobile. Already sore and exhausted after she’s worked over my nipples till they are sensitive and raw. A bowl appears. It’s full of clothes pegs. She pushes my legs apart so she can reach my cock and balls. I can do clothes pegs. I’ve been here before. I’ve had more then… Read More »
The blindfold lets in no light. There is no imperfectly sealed corner through which I might glimpse something familiar or comforting. It’s been on since the moment I walked through the door of the basement apartment in response to the text. Just an address, a time and a two word instruction: “Be there.” How could… Read More »
I’m a masochist but am I really submissive? I have had a couple of attempts to answer that but still don’t really feel I have got to the core of the question; the exact nature of my kink. Does it matter? Perhaps not. These labels are useful only in so far as they set out… Read More »
I have written quite a bit about anticipation; the delicious fear during the run-up to a challenging BDSM session and, just as delicious, the body’s reaction to it. At risk of turning my blog into amateur psychoanalysis of the worst kind; I think I know why this is almost a whole separate kink for me.
For closet kinks, those with an outwardly vanilla life, who tend to their kinks through sessions with professional service providers, discovery is the biggest fear. How, after all, could one possibly explain the need, the motivation, the lies, and the deception to a spouse or family?
A hotel room. A man lies on the bed, naked, waiting. A woman walks in. She removes a cane from her bag. She beats him with it. Hard. She leaves. There is no contact other than the cane. No words are spoken.
I love this song for its louche, languid style, for its wail against the ennui of everyday life and the search for a counter to it. But mostly I love it because……. IT’S ABOUT ME!
In the end, submitting to Mistress Darcy, which I had expressed concern about before the session, seemed such a natural act that she had me within ten minutes of meeting her. The combination of writing down my feelings about the act of submission, the long build up to our session and her own strong presence in the… Read More »
I write this the day before my first meeting with Mistress Darcy. It’s a lazy New York Sunday morning. Great coffee in a boutique coffee shop followed by a Jazz brunch. Central Park later.